Young woman receiving lip injection makeover

Dear Beatty,

I hate to admit it, but I’m obsessed with plastic surgery. I’m a 29 year old, single, Harvard MBA graduate with a great job in New York. I have already had several cosmetic surgeries, including facelift, rhinoplasty, and breast surgery. I’m ashamed to admit it, but I’m already thinking about other procedures. I have been to some of the best cosmetic surgeons in the country, but I am never satisfied with the results. Let me mention that I am a “sugar child”, I have had financial and sexual relations with diabetes since I was 20 years old. This helped pay for college because I was self-employed and had been estranged from my family for many years. I understand that I have many problems. I drink until it gets dark, I’m obsessed with pornography. After reading some of your articles Dan’s papers, I decided to write and see if you can help me.

Rihanna, Southampton և New York City *

* (“Rhianna” has become my patient. I have changed all my credentials to protect her anonymity and privacy.)

Dear Rihanna,

It took a lot of courage to reach out,: it is obvious that you have many problems, both past and present, that need to be accepted, solved և solved. The good news is that you understand that you need help, that cosmetic surgery is not the solution to the problems you have already discovered. I congratulate you on realizing that it is better to deal with your issues at the age of 29 than to spend your whole life on a road trip that will certainly not end well.

It has become virtually impossible to browse popular magazines and newspapers without encountering all kinds of beauty enhancers that promise to keep us forever young. Watch all the “extreme transformation” shows that appear on TV. Aesthetic surgery has become the main. In 2020, 17.5 million minimally invasive cosmetic surgeries were performed in the United States. The United States is the number one country in the world that performs the most cosmetic surgeries and procedures. Brazil is far from second.

Women և More and more men are coming to doctors in record numbers: Botox, laser surgery, slimming pills, breast augmentation, breast reduction, rhinoplasty, abdominal tightening, facelift, blepharoplasty (permanent) : male “improvements”.

Designer clothes, handbags, shoes և jewelry – worth thousands of dollars, many of these items adorn the covers of magazines. People long for bigger houses, more expensive cars, more “material toys” in every description, believing that outward beauty and extravagant lifestyles are the recipe for true happiness. Advertising և TV commercials constantly reinforce the idea that if you are a beautiful woman who marries a handsome, rich man, you will live happily in a private house on the water. Not true!

The truth is that being physically attractive, not having to worry about paying for a mortgage or putting food on the table, is an indisputable advantage in life. The reality of treating hundreds of the richest, best-educated, “successful” men and women in my private practice has taught me something else about fame and fortune.

The real life and relationships of the rich և celebrities (not the lives of superficial interviews or benefits on the red carpet) are no happier than most people. It is obvious that having a lot of money և being beautiful really opens doors. However, when we enter, we all still have to face our inner selves, our roles, our relationships, good, bad or ugly. If we do not deal with our depression, anxiety, and other psychiatric problems, including drug and alcohol problems, gambling addiction, and pornography, as well as our dysfunctional, often abusive relationships, sexual challenges, our money, and our extravagant lifestyle. temporarily.

What are the consequences of not going to the plate to deal with them? In my experience, most men and women on therapy have had a number of physical problems, including insomnia, high blood pressure, migraines, gastrointestinal problems, high cholesterol, back problems, and ulcers. a number of other physical problems. pains և pains. When these brave men and women allowed themselves to finally climb the plate, to overcome their mental pain, most began to feel much better, not only emotionally, but also physically. Holding the upper lip of violence is a definite recipe for disaster. If we continue to “fill” our emotions, these unexpressed feelings of pain, anger, frustration, depression, rejection, humiliation, disrespect, or abandonment will certainly find a place in our bodies.

So what is emotional and mental health? Emotional health occurs when we successfully cope with our pain so that we can finally relax. Only then can we truly accept living a happy life. Good therapy with a knowledgeable, caring therapist can make a valuable contribution to a better life.

Beatty Cohan, MSW, LCSW, AASECT is a nationally recognized psychotherapist, sex therapist, author For better, worse forever. Discover the path of eternal love, columnist, national speaker, national guest փորձագետ expert on television և host: Ask Beatty about the show In a progressive radio network. He has a private internship in New York and East Hampton.

Beatty would like to hear from you: welcomes your questions and comments. Send it too [email protected] or visit for more information.

Beatty Cohan, MSW, LCSW, AASECT: